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Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Fizzing dreams

Blogging is becoming addiction for me now-a-days. My mind has become a multi-threaded system where different thread keep on doing independent tasks in a mutually exclusive manner. One of my mind thread keep on thinking for India and its future, other keep polling RECD/NITD , one for office work and the last one for blogging . With all these threads working simultaneously eat up my whole CPU and I am not getting anytime to process my queued requests for my future . Just reading about Stochastic process in queuing theory ,this is what I found :
Wiki defines Stochastic Process as the process where there is some indeterminacy in its future evolution .

My Life satisfy all conditions of Stochastic Process i.e having some indeterminacy in my future evolution and dealing with not just one possible "reality" of how the process might evolve under time but multiple possibilities .So does that mean I define my life as Stochastic process ????


Anyways , my new post is about the fizzing dreams or bubbling dreams. Its about the busy life in corporate world .Few days back someone forward me a picture which really depicts the corporate cycle nicely . Here it is :




Sometimes when I met some of the managers in Cisco or of other MNC companies who work late nights ** still being managers **, it always remind me the words of my first manager "Get some life". And when such hardworking managers ask me "where do you see yourself after 5 or 10 years?" , I really don't have any answer because the answer in my mind is always "I don't want to be like you living such a restless life :-) :-)". Long time back ,Someone from higher management asked me "How do you think Corporate world has changed your life ? ". I normally resist such questions but on that day , due to some reflex action or in abruption , i replied to that question . My words were "It converted me from a human being into a resource, such a resource whose 50% is one project , 10% on that and rest 40% on that one" . Life in a corporate world can be expressed in the words of Taare Zammen par song "Jamme raho"


Kas Ke Joota Kas Ke Belt
Khoons Ke Andar Apni Shirt
Manzil Ko Chali Sawaari
Kandho Pe Zimmedari

Haath Mein File Man Mein Dum
Meelon Meel Chalenge Hum
Har Mushkil Se Takrayenge
Tas Se Mas Na Honge Hum

Ye Sote Bhee Hain Attention
Aage Rehne Ki Hai Tension
Mehnat Inko Pyari Hai
Ekdum Aagyakari Hain

Ye Omlet Par Hi Jeete Hain
Ye Tonic Saare Peete Hain
Waqt Pe Sote Waqt Pe Khate
Taan Ke Seena Padhte Jate
.......


Also there was a beautiful story on the busy life of the modern human being.The story goes like this :



================================
A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year Old son
waiting for him at the door.

SON: Daddy, may I ask you a question?

DAD: Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the man.

SON: Daddy, how much do you make an hour?

DAD: That's none of your business.
Why do you ask such a thing?' the man said angrily.

SON: I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?

DAD: If you must know, I make $50 an hour.

SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.

SON: Daddy, may I please borrow $25?

The father was furious, "If the only reason you asked about that is so you can borrow
some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself
straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard every day for such childish frivolities." The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.


The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy’s questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think: Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often.


The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.

"Are you asleep, son?" he asked.
"no daddy, I'm awake," replied the boy.
"I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier" said the man.
"It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you." Here's the $25 you asked
for.

The little boy sat straight up, smiling. "Oh, thank you daddy!" He yelled.

Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills. The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then Looked up at his father. " Why do you want more money if you already have some?" . The father grumbled.


"Because I didn't have enough, but now I do," the little boy replied.

"Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early
tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you."

===============================================



Don't you think we are making our lives more complex and just like software life cycle we are living a "Software engineer's life cycle" with defined stages and constrained and deadlines . It looks like the modern life cycle is like this :



Trying to pacify each relationship and becoming more and more successful is making our life just like the above picture. We want to donate to the NGO's but only after checking if the donation is in section 80c of income tax regulations , we want Govt to build fly over and roads but we make forged house rent certificates to save Tax. Can't life be as simple as in the movie "God must be crazy". If you have not watched , I will recommend everyone to watch it .. its a hilarious and simple movie .
Now its late for me as I also have to follow the "Software engineer's life cycle" from the morning. Good night folks. But now the issue is In my dreams I'm dying all the time

In my dreams I'm dying all the time
When I wake its kaleidoscopic mind
In my dreams I'm jealous all the time
Then I wake I'm going out of my mind

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Some Random Clicks

This click is from H.A.L Museum, Bangalore. Actually I wanted to take this photograph long back but didn't have a camera so couldn't take.



This pic was clicked by my papa while on his way to Bangalore. It’s taken from a moving train and The best part of the picture is Color's diversification. The blue color of water overlapping with the color of land and then the green trees touching the vast blue sky.





Its in a shop located in U.B.City .The moment I saw this sclupture , words of Sheila Chandra's song ""Ever So Lonely"" started echoing in my head ( youtube link ) .



I call this picture as "Color's of India or Mystic shades of India" . It’s also taken by my papa on his way to Bangalore.



These are two big banners outside the U.B.City. I liked both the quotes and I think both are quite apposite in the real world.
The Tragedy of the world is the geniuses are confused and the idiots are cocksure



Sunday, January 24, 2010

Murkiest Sky

I am sure by the Heading "Murkiest Sky" you all have got some hints on what I am going to write today . But let me become somewhat socialistic rather than becoming a realistic dogra ;-). This week my parents visited me as now at least they are getting hints that how much is the old saying can be true “A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life” but we with a slight digression in my case as I am already gone away without a wife . Aah thats not the theme of my story . Today we went for a dinner at a nice hotel .They served us nearly 30 different dishes and we tried everything ,But in reality we ate less and wasted more . The moment I clicked the photographs of our half done plates, for few seconds the below videos flash backed in front of my eyes. From that moment , one of my brains thread was in Busy waiting state and was continuously polling for this video. May be this video will look quite normal to you folks .This short film is about the hunger and poverty brought about by Globalization. The video is at the bottom of the post ,or you can view it on Youtube


The words of the video keep haunting my soul and spirit.

=======================
Let me tell their story
That no one else can hear
How can someone's laughter
Bring me close to tears
And you'll never know
Cause you're never there
After what we've seen
Can we close our eyes again.

Let me tell their story
You won't think is true
I have not forgotten
So I'm sharing it with you
For all the things we know
What have we really learned ?
Though I close my eyes
The images remain
And their story... Begins again.
============





Listening the oldies , I found some lines of Elton John's "Circle of Life" quite apposite to our current situation.


Some say eat or be eaten
Some say live and let live
But all are agreed as they join the stampede
You should never take more than you give

.........
.........

Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars
And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with the scars


Here now we are getting paid by MNC like hell and still we are just writing blogs and sending mails but doing nothing in reality in this respect. Those millions of bucks we earn in our lifetime are not because of our hard work or our brilliance but its some kinda of cannibalism which we are spreading in a sophisticated manner.How much we really contribute for the welfare of the poor. All we care is for all donations which will be under Section 80C of our income tax rule so that if we pay one thousand bucks to some NGO,we should get Tax benefits. Why don't we think for section 80C while donating in temples or while thousands of rupees on a movie ticket ?? I am not saying that we should not donate in temples or should not watch movies but we need to find some way with which we can really make some difference for the suppressed class of Society. Making Documentaries or information flow over these social problems is good but how much these are really helping them . In one way or the other , we can even utilize the resources we invest like the finance for the documentary or the Time I am wasting on sending mails or writing blogs or in thinking , for helping the real suppressed class . Its similar like Bal Thakarey saying that Shiv sena wont let Australians play on Maharastra Soil. I will say " What a patriotism MR. Thakarey ..!! " But I have a question for him "Australians are doing attacking on Indians due to foreign nationism but why the F**k Shiv sena or MNS attack on North Indians or Bihari's .. How the Shiv Sena or MNS brazen attacks are different from Australian attacks ??? If Australians do it under the name of Nationalism , then MNS or SHIV sena do it under the name of regionalism .." . We are just Hippocrates .

Like the old adage goes on "Charity begins at home", we need to step up and do something. Otherwise you will become like me and in the words of Albert Einstein ,soon you will be defined like this quote “Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little falls into lazy habits of thinking”.




Look into her eyes and now close your eyes . You will see a contrast of happiness and sadness .






The best part of the video is **When the hungry kids of the Poor man start eating to satisfy his hunger , that man told him to FIRST PRAY GOD and then eat**. How many of us normally do such things ??

This video just rose lots of question in my mind ...

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Drifting Flames





Watched a movie "Fracture" of Anthony Hopkins . Not a great movie or a movie to recommend but like some of the quotes of it Like "Even a broken clock is right twice a day" .In the movie , the writer has used some lines of an old poem of Dr Seuss from the book "OH!THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!".This book "OH!THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!" is basically for kids and the book concerns life and its challenges. I dont know if children can understand the real meaning of the poem or I am doing some misinterpretation of the poem . But to me ,it looks quite a dark poem as dark as the above pics .. crawling into my dreams .

Let me highlight the lines which were used in this movie . Read it and interpret them ;-) .. May be I am just goofing up everything because of my "Drifting thoughts" ..Here I am, on the road again, ....There I am, up on the stage ... There I go, playing star again, ....There I go, turn the page

=============

You'll be on your way up!
You'll be seeing great sites!
You'll join the high fliers!
who soar to high heights.

You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don't.
Because, sometimes, you won't.

I'm sorry to says so
but, sadly, it's true
that Bang-ups
and Hang-ups
can happen to you

You can get all hung up
in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on.
You'll be left in a Lurch.

You'll come down from the Lunch
wuth an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then,
that you'll be in a Slump.

And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted. But mostly they're dark.
A place that could sprain both elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you should go in,should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quaters? Or maybe not quite?
Or go around and back and sneak from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long and wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most usless place

The Waiting Place...

...for people just waiting.

Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.


NO!
That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
You'll find the bright places
where boom bands are playing.

Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored. There are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame! You'll be famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don't.
Because, sometimes, they won't.

I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Games you can't win
'cause you'll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not.
Alone will be something
you'll be quite a lot.

And when you're alone, theres a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.

But on you will go
though the whether be foul.
On you will go
though your enemies prowl.
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl.
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though you arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike.
And I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many stray birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with you left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will indeed!


=============================

Friday, January 1, 2010

As time goes by




Right now everyone is either busy in either celebrating the coming of New year or dumping the rusted memories of previous year . But I am enjoying a cup of Earl grey tea in one hand and typing with the other ,listening to the an antichrist singer "Marilyn Manson" on my roof top .Under the void sky and the black starless night without my headphones,the only sound I can listen is of chirrups of the insects and cascading of the waves of the cool breeze. Under such a night , these words are echoing in my mind.

Sometimes I feel I've got to
Run away I've got to
Get away
From the pain that you drive into the heart of me
The love we share
Seems to go nowhere
I've lost my lights
I toss and turn I can't sleep at night

As time goes by , we are reaching more and more closer toward the death and farther and farther from the Goal of life. Aah , those profound thoughts again . Concentrate dogra concentrate , calm down ..

Cool it, dude
Don't be rude
You will only get your temper up -
Whats the use ?
Let's have some Ghup Shup
You do the Gup and i will shut up ......

And now i am in power saving mode (shut up mode)....Silence .. silence and silence has surrounded me . And Within the silence comes peace...With peace comes freedom...With freedom comes silence ..!! . Right now all i am thinking of is the Flashback of the 2009 in the context of incredible India.

Some things take time to dawn on you
Like a morning that takes a whole night
How often when we haven't a clue
Does darkness turn to light

I am not going to give a list of news flashback here as you can get it very easily ,so google that if you want . I see this year as a year of change , not only climatic change but change in the thought process of the people of india . Till last year , Arunachal pradesh was the only state in the country with less than 2% of voting but this year we see sudden decrease in the voter's percentage in other states of India like Maharastra which shows of spreading of a view "Which country and why should I do this and that for the country... what has this country given to me and why do i need to repay it back ".There is not nothing good or bad in it but it just shows change in the ideology of people.One of the major achievement of this year was the coining of the term "Hindoo Terrorism" by some secularist politicians. Other than this,2009 has brought a new concept in Indian society " Live in the Society of Victimization where people are more comfortable being victimized than actually standby for themselves". This year we saw the rise of the regionalism under the guidance of Shri Shri Raj Thakeray ji and Slicing of india ignited by telangana and gorkhaland and Just like Adult Education initiatives, under the leadership of Swami N.D.Tiwary ,a new program 'Adult sex education' for Senior citizens. In this whole process of evolution , I pity Sardar Patel who wasted his time in integrating 565 semi-autonomous princely states and British-era colonial provinces into United India (In Chanakya's term "Uthishta Bharatha"). He could also have enjoyed a royal life of the politicians but woh kehte hai naa hindi mein "Vinaash kaale, viprit buddhi" . He scarified his whole life for integrating India and What we gave him back.. just a tag of "Iron Man of India". And now we should give another tags to our leaders who are fighting for separate states "Melting men of India". Few days back , an advertisement of Amul was published in The Hindu newspaper .

This advertisement explains the condition of India.

Few years back , I listened these lines somewhere :

Woh aadmi nahi ek mukamaal biyan hai
Uss ke mathee par gehri chot ka nisaan hai
Ek din milla tha ,chitroon mein mujhe
Mein ne jo pucha naam , tho kaha hindoostan hu mein

Now I can understand the real meaning of these lines . From the head to foot , Bharat maa ki bleeding and like Stigmata , i can feel her pain .

Dil dard ka tukda hai Patthar ki Dali si hai
Ek andha kuan hai Ya ek band Gali si hai
Ek chhota sa Lamha hai jo Khatm nahin hota
Main Laakh jalata hoon ye Bhasm nahin hota

This year of 2009 , i see the impact of the Change in the mindset of people in our Bollywood also. As Bollywood trends keep on changing with the the mindsets of the common Indian so now this feeling of resentment among each Indian can be easily seen in our movies. Whether we take an example of " Wednesday " which shows How much a common Indian is fed up by govt policies of feeding the terrorists or "Gulaal" which shows the resentment among several neglected communities of india. Not only this , we have seen some new Anthems coming up .

One of them was in Gulaal where piyush mishra recited the Version 1.0 of सरफरोशी की तमन्ना अब हमारे दिल में है by Ram Prasad Bismil ...

Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamare dil me hai
Dekhna hai zor kitna bazu-e-kaatil me hai
Waqt aane pe bataadenge tujhe e aasmaan
Hum abhi se kya batayen kya hamare dil me hai

Oh re Bismil kaash aate aaj tum Hindustaan
Dekhte ki mulk saara kya tashan, kya chill mein hai
Aaj ka launda yeh kehta hum to bismil thak gaye
Apni aazaadi to bhaiya laundiya ke dil mein hai.

Aaj ke jalson me Bismil ek gunga gaa raha.
Aur behron ka wo rela naachta mehfil mein hai
Haath ki khadi banaane ka zamaana lag gaya
Aaj to chaddi bhi silti englison ki mill mein hai

Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamare dil me hai
Dekhna hai zor kitna bazu-e-kaatil me hai





and the other was from the movie "Rann" where they altered the National anthem of India 'Jana Gaan Maan' to depict the present condition of india : Version 1.0 of Jana Gann Mana.




Jana Gann Mana Rann hai
Iss Rann mein
Zakhmi hua hai Bhaarat ka Bhaagya Vidhaata
Punjab Sindh Gujrat Maratha
Ek doosre se ladd ke mar rahein hain
Is desh ne humko ek kiya
Hum desh ke tukdey kar rahein hain
Dravid Utkal Banga
Khoon bahaa ker, ek rang ka kar diya humne tiranga
Sarhadon pe jung aur
Galiyon mein fasaad dangaVindh Himachal Yamuna Ganga
Mein tezaab ubal raha hai
Mar gaya sab ka zameer
Jaane kab zinda ho aagey
Phir bhi Tava shubh naame jaage
Tava shubh aashish maange
Aag mein jal kar cheekh raha hai
Phir bhi koi nahi sach ko bachaata
Gaahe tava jaya gaatha
Desh ka aisa haal hai lekin
Aapas mein ladd rahein NetaJana Gann Mangal daayak jaya hai
Bhaarat ko bacha le Vidhaata!!!
Jaya hai Ya yeh Marann hai
Jana Gann Mana Rann hai


Now i can see some light to my darkness just like The twilight of the Dawn or the dusk....
I see the Sun on the seas,
I see the gentle sway of the trees,
I see all this in the morning breeze,
I wish I could make Time freeze

But I can't freeze this time so let me try freezing my wandering thoughts in my mind.

There is a song in my heart .
A smile on my face ;
Life is an art ,
Not a rat race.

And you all know The problem with the rat race is even if you win you're still a rat and I dont wanna be a rat . One last gasp , one last stride, And you can take that victory ride .

Good night folks as Now my mind is calling me back to the dream lands which appear more real that the real world.


Regards,
Aditya Dogra
Is adult entertainment killing our children? or is killing our children entertaining our adults?